"Clothes Horse", and a 1987 photo

"You're turning into a clothes horse!" My mother said this after I put on my newest outfit. She had spent all of my life trying to get me to like clothes including treating every Easter and new school year as a happy time in which she "gifted" me with new togs. When I was fatter and younger, I hated clothes and had no interest in them because nothing looked good on my body. Now that I'd lost weight and looked better in them, she was criticizing me for being too interested in them. Such was the pattern with my mother who made sure that, no matter what I did, I was always failing.

This is the first picture of me that I sent to Tito. It was also the most adventurous piece of clothing that I ever wore in public as it was woven with gold threads throughout the "jacket" and "culottes" at the bottom. It was actually one integrated piece and a pain in the ass for going to the bathroom as it had to be pulled off entirely like a swimsuit. Still, I loved wearing it with black tights and felt I looked pretty good in it. When Tito got this picture, he didn't notice my clothes. Rather, he noticed how sparse my KISS pictures were on my wall in comparison to Aida and Jo who wallpapered their walls. I had plenty of posters, but I didn't like the "wallpaper" look and intentionally chose more space between my pictures.